365 Days of Qualities

*disclaimer: I am telling this from a female’s perspective.

A lot of us young people go out into the world and just date. Simply date with no real purpose. For instance, if we see a guy, find him attractive, and he likes us as well, we usually become a couple. There is hardly a time period where the people are trying to become friends and if there is a period like that, usually, the female is so consumed on the man’s words and temporary actions that she truly doesn’t get to know him.

I am guilty and either you are guilty or someone close to you is.

More often than not, this results in heartbreak because the two individuals really weren’t all that compatible. Yes, you might have put the time and effort in BUT what did you put the time and effort into? Did you ask all the right questions? (Now sometimes ladies, we can ask all the right questions and still be lied to.) Do you know where he sees himself in 10 years? Does he want kids? How does he feel about premarital sex? Does he believe in traditional gender roles when it comes to marriage? Would he be content making less than $100,000 at the age of 40? How often does he talk to his mother? Are his parents still together? And this, my friend, is not EVEN the tip of the iceberg. This is an ice cube.
Well wait, think about this. Do you even know the answers to these questions for yourself? If you stand for nothing, then you will fall for anything. If you don’t even know the answers to these questions, then how do you expect to know if you are compatible with him?

So ladies, and gents, instead of facing this heartbreak over and over again, I have come up with a plan. For the next 365 days, I will be keeping a journal about what type of man I want, along with what type of woman I want to become. I plan on doing this consistently and not dating until I have this list compiled. I will already admit that some things on this list will be pure aesthetics about my future husband. i.e. He must be at a certain height. But for the most part, it will be show me what qualities I am lacking and what my husband needs to have.

Be prepared to be wowed because sometimes I am shallow and then other times I am too deep.

Much Love,

Claire Ayrica

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